A New Phonetic Alphabet

Can I suggest the need for a new phonetic alphabet? What with Ancient Greek letters, old fashioned dances, metric weights, Canadian provinces and Shakespearean characters, today's youth have little chance of readily recalling the mnemonics attached to the letters.

We need to provide them with words instantly recognisable. Words they encounter every day. Words from the high street (or online shopping at least).

So I propose the following:

Alpha - ADIDAS
Bravo - BURBERRY
Charlie - CALVIN KLEIN
Delta - DIESEL
Echo - ELLESSE
Foxtrot - FILA
Golf - GIORGIO ARMANI
Hotel - HOLLISTER
India - IGI & CO
Juliet - JORDACHE
Kilo - KAPPA
Lima - LACOSTE
Mike - MARK JACOBS
November - NIKE
Oscar - OSHKOSH B'GOSH
Papa - PRADA
Quebec - QUICKSILVER
Romeo - REEBOK
Sierra - SUPERDRY
Tango - TOMMY HILFIGER
Uniform - UGG
Victor - VANS
Whiskey - WRANGLER
X-Ray - X-BIONIC
Yankee - YVES SAINT LAURENT
Zulu - ZARA


And to make it easier, these come with ready-made visual prompts.

 
 

  
 
 

 
 

 
 

 

 

Sometimes It Just Has To Be Spelled Out - Friday Flash

Mike she said

Do you know about Quebecois women?

We are not like your buttoned up Yankee girls

Or your Indian women high up there on the Sierras

Bravo ma cherie

For I am an Alpha male, just feel my deltoids

Alpha? Deltoids? Delta and Delta more like

Is there an Echo in here?

Bravo mon cheri, you deserve an Oscar

For you merely have the body of someone who plays a lot of Golf

Rather than a Romeo in the bed

I like you Juliet, same as I like my Whiskey, straight-up, bit of sour

Really? I like my men in Uniforms usually

Hey it takes two to Tango. Where’s your costume then?

If you had X-Ray vision you’d see what I was wearing under my coat

Anyway, I’m more of a Foxtrot girl than a Tango woman really

But I’ve booked the Hotel room

And I’ve also got a half a Kilo of Charlie

Half a key? That wouldn’t get us to November

Besides, I’m more about liver, Lima beans and a nice chianti

Ha Zulus!

Cos I think you’ll find it was fava beans, so to the Victor the spoils!

Now come to Papa!

Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo off!

for when there can be no reason for miscommunication...